Nearly retired family and divorce attorney Allan Koritzinsky and retired clinical psychologist Ken Waldron seem to have found a recipe for a happy marriage.
The two share the ingredients in their book, "A Road to Marital Success,” and spoke to the Waunakee Rotary Club at their Aug. 14 meeting.
Both Allan and Ken are members of the Madison Downtown Rotary Club. They both have worked with clients on their marriages and divorces, and were inspired by a study done on children who were having trouble in school.
The author of the study found that those children lacked the skills to do well in the classroom, and once they were taught those skills, their performance improved. Allan and Ken thought they could apply the same concept to individuals who have difficulty in their marriages.
They thought teaching individuals skills to resolve disagreements would improve their marriages.
While all couples have disagreements, those in successful marriages know how to resolve them. Those who don't end up thinking negative things about one another.
All of us have personality traits that are really just patterns of behavior. People can change their personalities by changing those patterns. For instance, Ken said he and his wife went to dinner with another couple, and he noticed as they left the restaurant, they were holding hands. He and his wife tried this and found the experience had changed.
While the authors didn’t have time to delve into all of the ingredients for a successful marriage or the skills needed, they did note that honesty is at the top of all nine ingredients.
“Honesty and trustworthiness are non-negotiable,” Allan said.
As far as skills needed, the ability to listen and communicate, and to consider the other person’s point of view during a disagreement is important. Their book sets forth scientifically proven skills for having a successful marriage. And, it’s important to keep in mind that one should play, not work, at marriage.
******
Guests: Jim Schweissal, guests of Jim and Jean Elvekrog; Allan Kortzinsky and Ken Waldron.
Other News:
-The Pizza Hut event at Bishops Bay will be Sept. 23.
-Wauktoberfest is Sept. 11-14
Greeters: Aug. 21, David Rupp and John Cullen; Aug. 28, Phil Willems and Max Ujdak; Sept. 4, Bill Kennedy and Jen Tasker; Sept. 11, Lori Derauf and ??
To sign up to greet or to find out if you are greeting, visit:
https://www.signupgenius.com/go/805054CAAAA2CA7F85-44320149-2023#/
